Lemon Berry Tartlets – Puff and Stuff

About 30 years ago, I made puff pastry from scratch in culinary school. It came out really, really well, and I haven’t made it since. Why? Because frozen puff pastry is so readily available, so consistently perfect, and so easy to work with, that the thought of going through all the time and trouble to make my own seems kind of crazy.

Of course, that’s a poor attitude for a cook, and one I’ve been fighting against all these years as I convince people that making your own bread, dressings, cheese, crème fraiche, etc. is a worthwhile pursuit. So, eventually I will show you how to make puff pastry, and hopefully somehow reconcile this obvious hypocrisy, but for now, we defrost.

By the way, I realize that berry season is probably over where you live, but fresh California blackberries were still around a few weeks ago when I filmed this video, and so I’m posting it anyway, seasonality be damned. This is really about the technique for making little puff pastry tart shells anyway, and I’m very confident you’ll figure out how to fill them.

Speaking of which, don’t limit your brainstorming to sweet treats. These lovely little cups make for a stellar base for all kinds of savory bites. I’ve filled these with sautéed mushrooms, chicken salads, and smoked salmon, just to name a few. Regardless of what you fill them with, they will be very well received. I hope you give these a try soon. Enjoy!

Ingredients for 12 tartlets:

1 sheet frozen puff pastry, partially thawed (you should get 12 tartlets if you use a 2-inch cutter like I did)

1 beaten egg

1/3 cup lemon curd, vanilla custard, chocolate mousse, whipped cream, or other appropriate filling

12 fresh blackberries

powdered sugar, as needed

*Bake puff pastry at 400 degrees F. for 13-15 minutes, allow to fully cool before filling.

Cinnamon buns

The plan for this morning was to write some hilarious thing about something or other as an introduction to these terrific cinammon buns, while the carpet man replaced the scraggy old carpet in what is about to be Kitty's new bedroom.

It was all going so well. I hadn't lost the recipe for the cinnamon buns, (a miracle), my laptop was working (double miracle), I'd had a cup of tea and the carpet man was actually early (such a miracle that I ought, then, to have smelled a rat).

But then he brought in the wrong carpet. It was a stripey one, the one we use on the stairs. Not the plain beige one, that we use in bedrooms.

Oh god!! Oh god oh god oh god I've ordered the wrong fucking carpet.

I searched my email, shaking, looking, searching frantically for some indication that this wasn't my fault. But it just completely was. Is. Is my fault. So I now have to re-order the carpet at vast expense and try, for the rest of the day, not to burst into tears about it.

"YOU KNEW I WAS AN IDIOT WHEN YOU MARRIED ME," I screamed pre-emptively and defensively at my husband, who was standing in the kitchen looking at me sympathetically.

Anyway here's a recipe for some cinnamon buns. They're nice.

Cinnamon buns by Edd Kimber
makes 16

For the dough

250ml whole milk
50g butter, plus extra for greasing tin
500g strong white bread flour
30g caster sugar
1 tsp salt
7g fast-action yeast. This is the equivalent of one of those sachets you get in boxes of yeast. I decided instead to use 7g of yeast in a tin, which was past its sell-by date, so the first lot of dough I made didn't rise and I had to throw it away and start again. It's all just going so well in my world at the moment.
1 egg, beaten
veg oil for greasing

For the filling

150g light brown soft sugar
3 tbsp ground cinnamon
60g butter, very soft, plus a bit extra to brush over the buns pre-baking
75g currants

... and some icing sugar. Edd mixes 125g icing sugar with 75 cream cheese and 2 tbsp whole milk. I didn't do this and plain icing is just fine. However, I have tasted this other sort of icing and it is very nice, so if you are so inclined, give it a go.

1 Put the milk and the butter in a small saucepan and heat very gently over the lowest available heat until the butter has melted. Set aside and leave it to cool to a lukewarm temperature.

2 In a bowl, mix together the:

- flour
- sugar
- salt
- yeast

to this add the milk/butter mix and the beaten egg. Mix this round until you have a dough.

3 Flour a surface and knead this for 10 minutes. Ten minutes is a VERY long time, so put a timer on or something because you will want, powerfully, to give up after about 3 minutes.

4 Put the dough in a bowl that is large enough for it to double in size. I do not have a bowl that big so I used a massive saucepan instead. Anyway whatever you use, lightly oil the base and sides.

And NOW stretch some cling film across the top of the pan/bowl in order to form an airtight seal over the dough. I think I am possibly the only person in the world who doesn't know that you are supposed to do this with dough, but I didn't. Maybe you don't know either. Maybe you think, like I used to, that you could just sling a tea-towel over it. No. If you do that air will get to it and form a very thin crust, which will both stop the dough from rising properly and also make it very difficult to shape later.

You're all laughing at me now, I can tell. Go ahead! I don't care! Kick me while I'm down why don't you.

5 Leave the dough to rise in a warm place for 1 hr. While this is happening grease with butter a 23cm x 33cm high sided baking tin. If you, like me, don't have one of these, you can use whatever combination of high-sided baking tins you've got to fit the buns in.

6 Tip your dough out onto a floured surface and roll out to 40x50cm. I ended up using a tape measure for this. The funny thing about rolling out dough like this is that at first you think - how am I going to roll this out to any sort of rectangle shape? If you try the dough sort springs back on itself and will only go into a round shape. But if you keep on rolling it out thinner and thinner it suddenly complies and relaxes into a rounded sort of rectangle. It has to be seen to be believed.

7 Mix the brown sugar and the cinnamon together in a bowl. Now take your 60g of very soft butter and spread the dough with it. Now sprinkle over the sugar mixture and then the currants. Don't be afraid to press all this into the dough reasonably firmly.

8 Now roll all this up into a tight log shape. I'm sure the Bake-Off Masterclasses showed a terribly clever way of doing this, but I missed that episode, so just do this the best way you can see how.

9 Trim the ends off the roll and then cut into 16 pieces. I used a tape measure again for this. All you do is mark out the middle of the roll, and then mark out the middles of those two halves and then again until you've got 16 bits. Cut these up and then arrange in your collection (or not) of baking tins then leave THESE to rise for 45 mins, again with the tins covered with an airtight seal of clingfilm. Before baking brush these with some melted butter.

10 Now - to bake. My oven is a fan oven and therefore nukes anything I bake, which is why I don't do much baking. If you have one of these wretched bloody ovens then bake your buns at 165 for 30 mins, laying a sheet of foil over the buns for the last 15 mins of baking time. If you don't have a fan oven, bake these at 180 for 30 mins, but also cover for the last 15 mins of baking time.

I lost my nerve halfway through baking these and turned the temp up to 180 and although the buns were a triumph, if anything they were a tiny bit over-cooked. So next time I will just stick to 165 the whole way.

11 Mix up whatever icing you are using and drizzle or spread once the buns have cooled a bit.

Eat and then hang yourself with a length of carpet gripper.


 

Go Vote!

If you follow me on Twitter, it's fairly obvious who I'm voting for, so I'm not doing any kind of recommendation here, but simply wanted to encourage you to vote. 

Whether you're voting for the President, or the talking haircut who agrees with 3% of the world's climate scientists, the important thing is to get out to the polls and make your voice heard. Enjoy!

Make-Ahead Turkey Wing Gravy, Because You Have Better Things to Do

I’m not a big fan of “make-ahead” recipes, but when it comes to Thanksgiving, the less we have to do before dinner, the better. This turkey wing gravy will not only free up valuable kitchen time, but chances are it will look and taste even better than those frantic, last-minute versions.

A world-class gravy, while not a difficult procedure, does require a little bit of finesse and attention to detail. Of course, screaming kids, chatty relatives, and alcohol consumption are the natural enemies of finesse and attention to detail, so for that reason I’m a big fan of this alternative technique.

By the way, as I mentioned at the end of the video, just because you’re making this ahead of time, doesn’t mean you’re throwing away all those amazing pan drippings. While your turkey’s resting (should be at least 30 minutes), pour off the juices, skim off the fat, and add it to your gravy.

For this reason, I’ll generally make the gravy a little thicker than I want, knowing I’m going to dump another cup or so of liquid in later. Speaking of thickness, as with all the sauces we do, you are in complete control. If you want thicker gravy, use more roux and/or reduce further. If you want something a bit lighter, use less roux and/or more stock.

Either way, making the turkey gravy ahead of time is just smart logistics, and frees you up for more important things, like watching football and fishing for compliments. I hope you give this a try. Enjoy!

Ingredients:

For the stock:

1 large onion, chopped

2 carrots, chopped

2 ribs celery, chopped

2 tsp vegetable oil

2 large turkey wings

10 cups cold water (1 or 2 to deglaze the pan, and 8 to add to stock)

4 springs thyme

2 cloves garlic, optional

For the gravy:

2-3 tablespoons reserved turkey fat

3 tbsp butter

1/2 cup flour

about 6 cups reserved, strained turkey stock

salt and pepper to taste

pinch of cayenne

Tabbouleh Sogomonian

Tabbouleh is another one of those popular recipes for which I’ve received hundreds of food wishes for, and yet inexplicably I’ve still not posted one. Why not? I have no idea. I’m as mystified as anyone. In the meantime, I wanted to share this fine version from friend of the blog Robert Sogomonian (aka @psyrixx). You can check out his original post here. Enjoy!

Lemon Curd “Lite” Not Light

I’m calling this lemon curd “lite” because it does have less fat than most traditional recipes, but that doesn’t mean it’s a “light” recipe. Calling this recipe “lite” is kind of like calling thin-crust pizza, “low-carb.” It’s all relative. 

Speaking of relative, as I mention in the video, this would make a great holiday gift, so even if you’re not a big fan of lemon, pay attention nonetheless. 

Above and beyond the nominally fewer calories, I really like the appearance and texture of this style lemon curd better anyway. Recipes that contain all yolks instead of whole eggs, and up to twice as much butter, are just too rich and heavy for my taste.

Since this is typically served as a sauce for things like gingerbread and scones, or as a filling for cakes, I don’t see the advantages of an overly heavy concoction. The one exception for me would be pies and tarts, where you probably do want the more hardcore variations.

I know a lot of you get nervous when whisking eggs over heat is involved, but as you’ll see, this is really simple to do. Besides, if tragedy does strike, and you get a few pieces of overcooked eggs in the mixture, simply put it through a strainer before adding the zest and butter. No one will ever know! With the holidays right around the corner, I hope you give this easy, old-fashioned lemon curd I try. Enjoy!

Ingredients for about 1 1/2 cups Lemon Curd:

3 whole large eggs

3/4 cup white sugar

2/3 cup freshly squeezed lemon juice

1 1/2 tbsp freshly grated lemon zest

5 tbsp unsalted butter, room temp, cut in 3 or 4 pieces

Bond, villain

I hope you don't mind my husband butting in on our conversation (that is not my husband above, that of course is Daniel Craig).

My husband, Giles Coren, will only be with us for a moment. He's just got a few words to say. It's a piece that was supposed to go in The Times on Saturday, you see - only they wouldn't run it. It was about James Bond and there's been too much Bond, they said, someone else is doing something on something or other. So write something else, yeah Giles? Well my husband is an accommodating sort of chap so he said okay then - but it's such a good piece it deserves to be read and Tweeted and to bust out from behind the paywall will make him so very chipper.

I promise this won't be a regular thing.

Coming soon: a recipe!!!



BOND, VILLAIN
(The piece they tried to ban. Warning! This contains plot spoilers...)

by Giles Coren

 

There is a moment in the new James Bond film so vile, sexist and sad that it made me feel physically sick. If you have not seen the film and fear a spoiler, then look away now. Or cancel your tickets and do something less horrible instead. Like pull all your fingernails out.

In short, there is a young woman in this film whom Bond correctly identifies (in his smug, smart-arse way) as a sex-worker who was kidnapped and enslaved as a child by human traffickers. She is now a brutalised and unwilling gangster’s moll. She gives no sign of being sexually interested in Bond, merely of being incredibly scared and unhappy. So he creeps uninvited into her hotel shower cubicle later that night, like Jimmy Savile, and silently screws her because he is bored.

That is vile enough. And totally out of keeping, I’d have thought, with Daniel Craig’s Bond. But it gets much worse when she is later tied up with a glass of whisky on her head in a hilarious William Tell spoof, and shot dead in a game devised by the baddie. We knew already knew the baddie was bad, so there was no plot developing element here. It was merely disgusting, exploitative, 1970s-style death-porn (like when Roger Moore torpedoed the beautiful girl in the helicopter in The Spy Who Loved Me and then joked about it – a scene from which it has taken me 35 years to recover).

The ‘new’ Bond’s immediate response to the killing of a tragic, abused, indentured slave woman is to say, “waste of good scotch” (this must be the ‘humour’ Daniel Craig said he was keen to put back into the role) and then kill everyone. He could have done it three minutes before and saved her. But that wouldn’t have been as funny, I guess.

That Macallan (the whisky brand on her head) presumably paid to be involved in the scene, as part of the film’s much-touted product placement programme, is utterly baffling to me.

Personally, I am ashamed, as a journalist, of the five star ratings this film garnered across the board from sheep-like critics afraid or unable to look through the hype, to its rotten soul.

I am ashamed, as a man, that women are still compelled in the 21st century to watch movies in which the three female outcomes are:

1) Judi Dench’s ‘M’ dies, and is replaced by a man;

2) The young abuse victim is shagged by Bond and then killed for a joke; and

3) The pretty girl who manages to remain chaste despite Bond’s ‘charms’ is rewarded at the end with a job as his secretary.

And I am ashamed, as a British person, that this film will be mistaken abroad for an example of prevailing values here. It is a sick, reactionary, depressing film and its director, Sam Mendes, should be ashamed of himself, all the way to the bank.